I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
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It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
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My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
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