he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
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he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
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