woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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