OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
