Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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