No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
