smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
