all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
