Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
