You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
