we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
