u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
a search helicopter?!
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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