I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize