My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
