If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
