yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize