things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
PANTIES FOUND
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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