I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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