just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
