just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
