If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize