Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
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