I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
