he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
