i think my tv is drunk
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Randomize
