I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
