Please, let me fuck your mom
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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