i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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