Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
