hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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