come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and you fell through a lawn chair
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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