Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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