I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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