Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(859): View more from Kentucky

Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(859): Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration? http://tfl.nu/14rv

Replies (13) Good night (687) Bad night (5713)
Favorite
(253): View more from Washington

Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(253): Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college. http://tfl.nu/tulo

Replies (40) Good night (6463) Bad night (1530)
Favorite
(313): View more from Michigan

Are we still banned from the library?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(313): Are we still banned from the library? http://tfl.nu/xtiu

Replies (12) Good night (2405) Bad night (686)
Favorite
(920): View more from Wisconsin

Technically my penis started a fight tonight

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(920): Technically my penis started a fight tonight http://tfl.nu/2ets

Replies (14) Good night (1272) Bad night (439)
Favorite
(805): View more from California

If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(805): If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that http://tfl.nu/xc7d

Replies (7) Good night (555) Bad night (1241)
Favorite
(905): View more from Ontario

You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"

(1-905): View more from Ontario

He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(905): You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot" (1-905): He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka. http://tfl.nu/0kc2

Replies (4) Good night (1132) Bad night (885)
Favorite
(507): View more from Minnesota

Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking

(815): View more from Illinois

the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(507): Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking (815): the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ http://tfl.nu/al4m

Replies (5) Good night (1209) Bad night (340)
Favorite
(309): View more from Illinois

note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(309): note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never. http://tfl.nu/8ha6

Replies (7) Good night (327) Bad night (1111)
Favorite
(641): View more from Iowa

I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(641): I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it. http://tfl.nu/0z7a

Replies (5) Good night (325) Bad night (717)
Favorite
(218): View more from Minnesota

I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(218): I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans http://tfl.nu/y0vw

Replies (1) Good night (832) Bad night (270)
Favorite
(61): View more from Australia

Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(61): Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive. http://tfl.nu/0qk3

Replies (5) Good night (443) Bad night (233)
Favorite
(647): View more from Ontario

btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(647): btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns. http://tfl.nu/3mk5

Replies (5) Good night (659) Bad night (238)
Favorite
(620): View more from Kansas

When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(620): When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment. http://tfl.nu/putw

Replies (1) Good night (496) Bad night (289)
Favorite
(516): View more from New York

Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(516): Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE. http://tfl.nu/3y8r

Replies (0) Good night (343) Bad night (209)
Favorite
(443): View more from Maryland

I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(443): I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send". http://tfl.nu/jpis

Replies (6) Good night (1327) Bad night (247)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: