awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
We are two peas in an std pod
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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