Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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