Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
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