she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
