her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
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