Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
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