She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
