awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
