He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
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He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
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he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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