I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
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