Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize