so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize