We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
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