Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize
