SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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