somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
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Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
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We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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