I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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