I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
