If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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